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Check out the Erotica Pimp, Artist of the Week, Novel Review and Guest bios on Lakotaphillips.com/BreakingTaboo.html
Breaking Taboo – Lead Story: BDSM - what you didn't know, probably don't wanna know, but are going to learn the truth about anyway.
Words like domination, submission, bondage and the acronym BDSM evokes images of dungeons, screaming women (and men) being brutally whipped and sexually ravaged by leather clad men (and women). While no doubt that kind of painful extreme goes on in some hardcore playrooms, it really doesn’t represent the true picture of what BDSM play or lifestyle is. And by the way – play and lifestyle are two very different things in the kink-loving culture.
The acronym BDSM is derived from the words bondage, dominance, submission, sadism and masochism. There are more misconceptions about BDSM than probably any other area of human psychological and sexual relationships. So we’re gonna de-myth that sucker for you with the help of Eden Bradley who is a well known erotica author and been in the BDSM lifestyle for 25 years.
MYTH: BDSM is abuse.
FACT: BDSM is Safe, Sane and CONSENSUAL…..Abuse is NEVER consensual.
MYTH: BDSM is all about pain.
FACT: Pain isn't enjoyable to all people and you don't have to enjoy pain to be into BDSM. It’s about enjoyment, stimulation, pleasure, and most of all, trust. It is never done with the intent to harm and never done in anger. Many practitioners prefer dress up, bondage, mild spankings and control.
MYTH: People in BDSM are into pain and like to hurt each other.
FACT: Part of the allure of BDSM is the appearance of danger. Pain is perceived differently from person to person. A light flogging may be too intense for one person, while a heavy flogging may be perfect for someone else.
MYTH: People who engage in BDSM were all abused as children.
FACT: There is no documented proof that BDSM activities come from childhood abuse. Sweeping generalizations tend to further stigmatize our diverse needs.
MYTH: Only gay men practice BDSM.
FACT: It has nothing to do with sexual orientation or gender identity.
MYTH: The Dominant partner is a control freak.
FACT: In BDSM, the submissive willingly gives up the control to the Dominant, who takes that control, combines it with his own energy and redirects it back to the sub. Ultimately submissives have the final say. They can submit or not.
MYTH: The submissive partner is weak.
FACT: The majority of submissives involved in BDSM are strong, self-sufficient individuals, who have intense and high-powered occupations. It is very common to find lawyers, doctors, CEO’s and politicians who practice the submissive role.
MYTH: BDSM is all about sex.
FACT: There are some who practice BDSM who do not experience any sexual arousal. Being in the scene doesn't mean you are automatically going to get laid.
MYTH: BDSMers are all people who live on the fringes of society.
FACT: There are very prominent people into BDSM, from all walks of life, all over the world.
Breaking Taboo -Story 2: The Erotica Sex-revolution
How has erotica changed how women view themselves and their sexuality?
One of the quickest growing markets in the publishing industry has been the erotic romance genre. One of the reasons it’s so popular is because it is diverse – covering all other genres of fiction fr om suspense to paranormal to sci-fi to western and historical and even the kinkier BDSM and ménage ala however many the author can fit into the plot.
Face it – we like the steamy hot sex. And other fiction is having to follow the trend of more explicit and sensual scenarios in their stories in order to satisfy the readers. The myth that women don’t like sex is being systematically crushed as the female gender slip into our FMPs and saunter out into the naughty night, looking for some satisfaction. The “good girls don’t” adage has changed to “good girls don’t get caught” and even more so to “good girls DO and do it often.”
What is causing this change in sexual attitudes in women? There are numerous contributing factors, one of them being the fiction we read. Women reading about other women embracing and exploring their sexual needs is allowing a large number of us to toss aside inhibitions (okay – for some more like stealthy sneaking past our inhibitions) as we explore what it means to be a sexually aware creature.
“Exactly why erotic literature has become so popular now is a matter of speculation, though it doesn't seem entirely coincidental that the creators were mostly raised in the era of Madonna videos on MTV, open discussion of sex during the initial HIV scare, and the mainstreaming of porn. Much of the new erotica is simply porn moved to the printed page, only smarter and largely aimed at women.”
Interesting to note is that men are starting to read erotica too. Trust me – this promises to be a beautiful thing for women everywhere. http://today.msnbc.msn.com/id/36835812/n